It is our intent to inspire these women and children to become survivors and assist them in regaining control of their lives. In addition to the wide range of services we provide, our goal is to help them restore their self-esteem. Counseling, therapy, and a supportive family environment within the shelter help to rebuild the independence necessary for reentering the community to live a safe and productive new life. We receive and are dependent upon support from local sources: civic groups, religious groups, businesses, private citizens and grants. Income is also generated through various community fundraising events.
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Services Offered
Sexual Assault - Madeline's House is a non-profit organization, providing comprehensive services for individuals and families experiencing domestic and sexual abuse. We receive and are dependent upon support from local sources: civic groups, religious groups, businesses, private citizens and grants. Income is also generated through various community fundraising events. Southside Center for Violence Prevention, Inc. was established in 1999 in response to the cries of persons who experience domestic and sexual violence, and their primary need for immediate help and safety by: * Providing temporary housing * Empowering clients and residents to become survivors * Assisting them in regaining control of their lives through a wide range of appropriate services, and * Supporting these individuals in ending their experience of violence and homelessness through client advocacy, counseling, and community support systems.
Domestic Violence - Domestic Violence is a crime. It happens in many ways: coercion, emotional abuse, isolation, withholding money, sexual abuse, and so on. The abuser can be a family member, spouse, domestic partner, or a live-in-partner who wants to control the victim. Domestic violence can happen to anyone! One in 3 women report being a victim of domestic violence at some point in their lifetime. t can sometimes be difficult to tell if someone is in an abusive relationship. It can even be difficult for a victim to realize she or he is in an abusive relationship. Those who are abused, and those who abuse others, come in all personality types from all different backgrounds. Most people experiencing violence from someone close to them do not tell others about it. So how do you know?
* Here are some signs to look for *: * Verbal Abuse, name calling, constant criticisms or humiliation. * Bruises and Injuries: she can't explain or makes weak excuses for them. * Controlling Behavior: abuser constantly asks about activities, calls her at work all day, checks car mileage, and listens in on her phone calls, manages all the finances and monitors her spending. * Extremely Jealous and Possessive: he accuses her of flirting or having affairs. * She is fearful or quiet when he is around. * Behavior of the Children: worsens, get into trouble at school, quiet and withdrawn and don't get along with others.
* Battering Personality *
Possessiveness - At the beginning of a relationship, an abuser may say that jealousy (actually possessiveness) is a sign of love. Possessiveness has nothing to do with love. It is a sign of lack of trust. The abuser may question his partner about who she talks to, accuse her of flirting, or keep her from spending time with family, friends, or children. As the possessiveness progresses, he may call her frequently during the day or drop by unexpectedly. He may refuse to let her work for fear she'll meet someone else, or even engage in behaviors such as checking her car mileage or asking friends to watch her.
Controlling Behavior - At first the abuser will say this behavior is due to his concern for her safety, her need to use her time well, or her need to make good decisions. He will be angry if the woman is "late" coming back from the store or an appointment; he will question her closely about where she went and who she talked with. As this behavior progresses, he may not let the woman make personal decisions about the house, her clothing, or even going to church. He may keep all the money or even make her ask permission to leave the house or room.
Quick Involvement - Many battered women dated or knew their abuser for less than six months before they were married, engaged, or living together. He comes in like a whirlwind, claiming, "you're the only person I could ever talk to", or "I've never been loved like this by anyone." He will pressure the woman to commit to the relationship in such a way that later the woman may feel very guilty or that she's "letting him down" if she wants to slow down involvement or break off the relationship.
Unrealistic Expectations - Abusive people will expect their partner to meet all their needs. He expects a perfect wife, mother, lover, and friend. He will say things such as "if you love me, I'm all you need, and you're all I need." His partner is expected to take care of everything for him emotionally and in the home.
Isolation - The abusive person tries to cut his partner off from all resources. If she has male friends, she's a "whore." If she has women friends, she's a lesbian. If she's close to family, she's "tied to the apron strings." He accuses people who are the woman's supports of causing trouble. He may want to live in the country, without a telephone, or refuse to let her drive the car, or he may try to keep her from working or going to school.
Blames Others for Problems - If he is chronically unemployed, someone is always doing him wrong or out to get him. He may make mistakes and then blame the woman for upsetting him and keeping him from concentrating on the task at hand. He may tell the woman she is at fault for virtually anything that goes wrong in his life.
Blames Others for Feelings - The abuser may tell his partner "you make me mad," "you're hurting me by not doing what I want you to do," or "I can't help being angry." He is the one who makes the decision about what he thinks or feels, but he will use these feelings to manipulate his partner. Harder to catch are claims, "you make me happy," or "you control how I feel."
Hypersensitivity - An abuser is easily insulted, claiming his feelings are hurt, when in actuality he is angry or taking the slightest setback as a personal attack. He will rant and rave about the injustice of things that have happened, things that are just a part of living (for example being asked to work late, getting a traffic ticket, being asked to help with chores, or being told some behavior is annoying).
Cruelty to Animals or Children - Abusers may punish animals brutally or be insensitive to their pain or suffering. An abuser may expect children to be capable of things beyond their abilities (e.g. punishes a 2 year old for wetting a diaper). He may tease children until they cry. Some studies indicate that about 60% of men who physically abuse their partners also abuse their children.
Sexual Abuse - An abuser may physically assault private parts of a woman's body. He may show little concern about whether the woman wants to have sex and use violence to coerce her into having sex with him. He may begin having sex with his partner while she is sleeping. He may force her to do sexual acts that she finds uncomfortable, unpleasant, or degrading. He may demand sex after beating her.
Verbal Abuse - In addition to saying things that are intentionally meant to be cruel and hurtful, verbal abuse is also apparent in the abuser's degrading of his partner, cursing her, and belittling her accomplishments. The abuser tells her she is stupid and unable to function without him. This may involve waking her up to verbally abuse her or not letting her go to sleep.
Rigid Sex Roles - The abuser expects his partner to serve him. He may even say the woman must stay at home and obey in all things - even acts that are criminal in nature. The abuser sees women as inferior to men, responsible for menial tasks, and unable to be a whole person without a relationship.
Dr. Jekyll-Mr. Hyde Personality - Many women are confused by the abuser's sudden changes in mood. She may think he has some sort of mental problem because one minute he's agreeable, the next he's exploding. Explosiveness and moodiness are typical of men who beat their partners. These behaviors are related to other characteristics, such as hypersensitivity.
Past Battering - The abuser may say he has hit women in the past, but blame them for the abuse (e.g., "they made me do it"). The woman may hear from relatives or ex-partners that he is abusive. An abuser will abuse any woman he is with if the relationship lasts long enough for the violence to begin; situational circumstances do not make one's personality abusive.
Threats of Violence - This includes any threat of physical force meant to control the partner. "I'll slap your mouth off, "I'll kill you," "I'll break your neck." Most people do not threaten their partners. Abusers will try to excuse their threats by saying that everybody talks that way.
Breaking or Striking Objects - Breaking loved possessions is used as a punishment, but mostly to terrorize the woman into submission. The abuser may beat on the table with his fist, or throw objects around or near his partner. There is great danger when someone thinks he has the right to punish or frighten his partner.
Any Force During an Argument - This may involve the abuser's holding the woman down, physically restraining her from leaving the room, or any pushing or shoving. He may hold his partner against the wall, telling her, "You're going to listen to me."
Fees and Payment
Madeline's House is solely dependent on contributions, and grants as they are available. The vast majority of contributions are used for the operation of the shelter and program costs. We're a non profit agency. Check our DONATE page for more information.
Services Offered To: Adults Teens Children
Special Groups: Bilingual LGBTQ
Payment: Sliding Scale Pro-bono
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Qualifying for assistance from Virginia's program usually depends on the severity of your condition and financial circumstance. Read our full guide to Virginia's program.
A community counseling agency is a group therapy practice that offers affordable mental health services. Most are independent non-profit agencies, state agencies, or publicly-funded agencies. A few may restrict who is eligible for services, so it is a good idea to check when you call.
Community counseling agencies are generally more affordable than other therapy providers, but how much more affordable they are will depend on whether you qualify for a discount or sliding scale fee (or if they accept your insurance). Many, but not all, have a policy that they won't turn away anyone due to inability to pay. You should ask about their fees when you first call.
Expect to talk to kind people who want to help you find the care you need. Most community agencies strive to connect you with a live person within 24 hours, if not immediately. If you're asked to hold or leave a message, don't give up; just leave a message and wait. You should hear back pretty quickly.
Most agencies try to set up an initial assessment appointment within a week (some do within 24 hours), though the waitlist to start therapy is usually longer—about a few weeks on average. If you're not eligible or if the agency is not right for you, it's usually still worth it to call or drop in, because staff are knowledgeable about local options and can often refer you to one.
